The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog & Kirby
by Rocket67
Summary: Sonic and friends crash land on Popstar where they meet the pink wonder himself. Warning: Chpt. 5 may gross out some people. Viewer Discretion Advised. The last chapter before I end it is here!
1. Crash Landing on Popstar

The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and Kirby!

Summary: Sonic and Pals end up on Popstar and meet the pink wonder himself. Insanity ensues!

Outer Space 8:45 p.m.

"Well Tails another day in space." Sonic moaned. "I'm sorry but shouldn't we have been done already?" Tails was doing some chatting on the computer. "Well Sonic it's taking longer than I expected…" A green hawk was chilling on the couch. "Well this better be as good as you said!" Jet cried. "I didn't come with you for nothing, I came for some jewels." "Well it'll have to wait; we won't be leaving this ship for a long time..." Knuckles said.

Well, for starters Sonic and friends, along with the Babylon Rouges are on a space expedition looking for the chaos emeralds that, Tails believes, is possibly on another planet. It's been a month now and the gang is getting restless. First, Sonic blows up the generator thinking it was a video game, then the Babylon Rouges go and ride their boards in space…which get lost. Then finally Knuckles breaks their only ways of communication through his rage and frustration at Storm.

Suddenly, a big meteorite hits the ship and destroys the plane, sending the heroes plummeting down to a nearby planet. "AAAGH! We're going to die!" Tails cried. "Why did I bother with this mission in the first place?" "Wave, I've always wanted to say this…I love you!" Tails wailed. "Get away from me…" Wave said and slowly took a few steps back. "Tails you drunk?" Sonic asked. "Nonsense!" Tails stammered and gave a small hiccup and a drunken chuckle. "Please! There are so many things I haven't tried yet!" Jet cried.

The thing he didn't get to try

Jet came walking in with roller blades and an outfit with a platter in his hand. "Here's your extra large cheeseburger and French fries with a fountain drink." Jet said to the waiting customer. "Thanks." said the man. He threw him some change and left.

Jet started to cry. "WHY!WHY?" He hollered.

BANG!  
SMASH!

BOOM!

Kirby's house 4:50 a.m.

Kirby leaped into the room. and held up a contract. "My show's back on the air baby!" He said. "Oh that's great man." Waddle Dee said. "Those other shows on 4kids are gay, especially Viva Piñata." Metaknight said. "Hey Kirby, look at this!" Waddle Dee cried. "What?" Kirby asked.

"There is a multi-colored meteorite heading straight for us…"

"…."

"ALRIGHT, QUICKLY EVERYONE! EVACUATE THE HOUSE!"

BANG!

Everyone was dazed on the ground shaking their heads to get back to reality. "Would you like fries with that?" Jet asked completely dazed. Sonic got up and stared at Kirby, he stared right back at him. "We come in peace." Sonic said slowly. "Do you understand?" Kirby cocked an eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

"HA! You can speak my language?"

"Do I look stupid?"

"…yes…"

"You look like a good ally." Sonic said with a smirk. "Right back at ya!" Kirby replied.

Meanwhile…at Castle DeDeDe.

A big, blue penguin was waiting, impatiently, for something to arrive. Suddenly a ring at the door bell. "Finally! I'm like starving here!" King Dedede cried. He sprinted towards the door and threw it open. He grabbed the pizza from the pizza guy and yelled, "No food for you!" and slammed the door. "FOOOOOODDDD!" He cried. He swallowed the pizza in one bite. "Master Dedede…" Waddle Doo said. "Do you MIND!" King Dedede hollered his mouth still full of pizza. "I'm eating here!" "Uh, sorry but we have six new visitors that have crash landed." Waddle Doo said. King Dedede gasped. "Do they have food!" He asked. "…no…" Waddle Doo replied. "Then I have nothing to do with them." King Dedede replied.

There you have it! Stay tuned for chapter 2 coming soon!


	2. Crazy Ninjas! pt1

Crazy Ninjas!

It's Parody time! This little Naruto parody finds Sonic and friends heading to a ninja school…uh-oh…

Sonic was chilling on the couch watching some movie called Spider-Dude. About some Californian surfer who gains the powers of the spider and fights the green teddy bear. "Hey Tails!" Sonic yelled. "Get your sorry two-tailed ass over here now!" Tails came dashing down. "Yeah, what is it?" Tails asked. "This movie is gay…" Sonic answered. Kirby came walking in with a letter. "Hey guys, I found this in the mail." Kirby said. It said this:

Dear, Sonic, Kirby, Jet, Wave etc., etc.

We have chosen you all for a chance to become first class ninjas at the Ninja Academy for Stupid Morons like you! You will learn:

The way of invisibility

Ninja weapons

All this other junk….

So come on down and check it out…right now!

Sincerely,

Mr. Ned

Sonic stood up. "Do you realize what this means?" Sonic said. "We get to become ninjas?" Jet replied. "Oh, hell no!" Sonic answered. "We get to kick butt like Naruto does!" "Free FOOD!" King Dedede cried. "FOOOOOODDDD!" He hollered and smashed through the window towards the school.

Ninja Academy: 9:45 a.m.

Sonic and friends were waiting patiently for their sensei to arrive. They had to watch some G rated movie for family audiences. "Will you play with me?" said some stupid kid. "Sure!" said some other stupid kid. And they did nothing but play. "This movie has no conflict!" Sonic cried. He took out a gun and blew up the T.V. with the cursed DVD inside. Everyone cheered. The sensei came in staring at the smoldering ash heap what was originally his T.V. "Um, did something happen?" He asked. "No, no…" Sonic replied rolling his eyes. A few hours later, Sonic's sensei came in. "No freaking way!" Sonic said. Some guy Sonic didn't even know of but saw on T.V. once had instantly popped up in front of him. "It's Mr. Game and Watch!" Jet cried. Jet was Sonic's teammate. "What're you doing as our sensei?" Sonic asked. "I needed to get a job so I came here…" Game and Watch said. "Well, that's odd…" Kirby said. Sonic third teammate and partner in crime. "So have you had any experience in ninjutsu?" Game and Watch asked. "Oh, yeah!" Sonic said. "Jet and I have been asked to assassinate plenty of people!"

One person they assassinated

Orochimaru slowly walked up to a well beaten Sasuke. "Say your good-byes…" Orochimaru said and slowly raised the sword. Sonic and Jet snuck up behind him and stabbed him clean in his back. Jet covered Orochimaru's mouth to muffle the scream. Orochimaru was dead. "Tell the other ninjas what you just saw!" Sonic said. Sasuke nodded and dashed off with the remaining strength he had.

Another person they assassinated

Crazy Frog was walking into his trailer.

BANG!

Crazy Frog dropped dead. "Direct Hit!" Jet cried. "No more annoyances!" Sonic cried.

Game and Watch stared in amazement. "You, assassinated Orochimaru!" He asked in bewilderment. "That was on the Leaf Village News for months!" Kirby cried. "Yeah, we know!" Sonic smirked. A few hours later, Sonic and his newly arranged team were training with Game and Watch when suddenly… "Guess who?" said a voice Sonic would never forget. "No…not!" Sonic couldn't finish his sentence because Amy dashed up and wrapped her arms around him. "NOOOOOO!" Sonic cried in agony.

Tails, Knuckles and King Dedede were waiting for their sensei to come out the door. "When do we get the food?" Triple D asked anxiously. "Whenever we're ready…" Knuckles said. Their sensei came in. "Oh…MY…GOD!" Tails hollered.

OOOOH! Real cliff hanger! Wait for chapter 3 to come and find out who their sensei is!


	3. Crazy Ninjas! pt2

Crazy Ninjas! pt.2

It's part 2 of Crazy Ninjas! Enjoy…

Tails and the others were staring wide eyed at their sensei. "What the heck? Kakashi sensei what're you doing here?" Tails asked. "It's a long story…" Meanwhile

Sonic was weeping by a tree because Amy found him. "How in the world she find me?" Sonic cried. "We'll never know…" Jet said. "She's a stalker!" Sonic cried and went into a fetal position. Kirby shook his head. "Does he hate her that much?" "Have you ever been stalked?" Jet asked. "Good point." Kirby answered.

"Tell me." Tails said. "How did you get here?" "Well, Shadow came into the village and…" Kakashi didn't have to tell them what Shadow did next. Knuckles sighed. "So everyone in the Hidden Leaf Village was teleported here?" "Yeah." Kakashi answered. "That hedgehog is trouble." Sonic burst into the room, red veins pulsing in his eyes. "Hide me…" Sonic whispered and ducked under a desk. "Oh, Sonic!" Amy called. Everyone flinched. "How'd she get here?" Tails whispered to Knuckles. "Probably stowed away on the ship." Knuckles whispered back. "Hey, Jet I found the little pink stalker." Kirby called out.

Waddle Dee, Metaknight and Storm were looking around the Hidden Leaf Village. "How'd this place get on this planet?" Storm asked. "Who knows Storm…who knows?" Waddle Dee answered. Metaknight simply shrugged and walked into a ramen bar. "I'll have the special please." Metaknight requested. The waiter tossed him a ramen bowl full of vegetables and tasty salt pork and noodles. Metaknight took the chopsticks and started eating. Sonic dashed into the village with Amy hot on his trail. "HELP MEEEE!" Sonic hollered. Suddenly, as if someone had answered his call a certain someone came out of nowhere and quickly used a transformation jutsu to change into Sonic. Amy looked around and found the imposter and chased him down. Unfortunately, it was a shadow clone. "Wow, things just get stranger and stranger!" Sonic said. "I just met Naruto!" Naruto chuckled. "Well, well look what the cat dragged in!" He said with a smirk. "It's Sonic the Hedgehog in person!"

What? You thought only Sonic and Kirby would be involved? Stayed tuned for Chapter 4 coming soon!


	4. Sonic's Scary Stuff: The Symbiote

Sonic's Scary Stuff!

Prologue

Well after the big meeting with Kirby and a sudden appearance of the Leaf Village, we thought that nothing would possibly go wrong (Except for Amy of course). Until one day Amy got possessed by the unexpected stowaway that meant to take control of us…the symbiote!

This parody of a horror movie is known as…The Symbiote (I couldn't think of a better name…)

Sonic and Naruto were watching a movie, specifically the new Full Metal Alchemist movie. They were stunned. "Have you seen a cooler movie than this?" Sonic asked. "Well, my movies come up to the greatness of this one…" Naruto answered. King Dedede walked down the stairs and spotted the popcorn (and I don't have to tell you about his obsession over food). "FOOOOOODDD!" King Dedede hollered. Sonic and Naruto flinched and jumped out of the way. King Dedede devoured the popcorn. "Hey! You can't just eat other people's food like that!" Naruto cried. "You make Chouji look like a well mannered person when he's eating around the table!"

Tails and the others were watching a new horror movie called the Grudge 2. Hinata was hiding her head in the pillow, Knuckles was shivering, Jet was screaming like a girl and holding on to Rock Lee, who shook him off, and Kirby was just eating the popcorn. "Man, this movie hasn't even come to theatres back on our planet yet!" Tails said. "Do you get everything first?" Jet asked. "No, you're thinking of Japan." Kirby answered. "They get everything first and earlier than most of us." Suddenly the lights went out. "Sonic! Did you forget to pay the bill again?" Waddle Dee asked. "No! I paid at last a week ago!" Sonic replied. Everyone ran upstairs with Tails' flashlight in handy.

"Alright, obviously someone's playing games with us!" Storm said. "I've seen movies like these!" Jet cried. "They pick us off one by one and make us their mindless drooling slaves!" Everyone stared at Jet who was in a fetal position. "And the funny guy always goes first!" Jet said finishing his sentence. "No one will be getting caught okay?" Tails asked. "Okay." Rock Lee replied. "Sure." Sonic and Naruto said. "Whatever…" Knuckles said. "Yeah!" Kirby and Waddle Dee answered. No answer from Hinata and King Dedede. "Alright…" Jet whimpered. "Yep!" Storm said. "Hey! Where are Hinata and King Dedede?" Naruto asked.

"Hey Naruto…"

Everyone turned around in fear and saw Amy, Hinata and King Dedede, covered in the symbiote! "Time to play!" Hinata said in a deep spooky voice. Her arm changed into a chainsaw and she sprinted towards the others swaying it around. Everyone screamed and ran towards the nearest window banging on the thick glass. Two ninjas and a local of Popstar were walking by. "Hey!" said the one ninja. "That's some cool beat!" "Yeah!" the other one said. "We're doomed!" Jet cried. Sonic and the others were already gone. "Guys?" Jet called. He heard an evil laugh. Jet screamed as the symbiote closed in on him. The others were hiding under the bed. "Man!" Sonic said. "I haven't been in any scary situations since the time at the kindergarten class."

"At the Kindergarten class…"

Sonic was wrapped in rope and hanging above a bunch of teddy bears with kids circling him. Suddenly the scariest thing approached him. "Why hello there you cute little hedgehog!" Barney said. "NOOOOOOOOO!" Sonic cried and tried to get away before the big purple dinosaur could land a hug on him. Too late though, Barney squeezed Sonic and kissed him on the head. Sonic's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he fainted.

They heard the footsteps get closer and closer. "Hey kiddies!" King Dedede said. "Why don't you come out and play!" His arm turned into an axe and he swung it into the bed, narrowly missing Sonic's head. They dashed from under the bed and towards the living room. A tentacle came and grabbed Storm's leg. "Oh, come on!" Storm said "At least let me escape! Take Knuckles instead." The symbiote just dragged him into the basement. "Storm!" Sonic cried. He stood there for five seconds. "You miss him?" Tails asked. "Miss who?" Sonic replied. Then Amy leaped in front of them. "Hello! Let's play tag!" she cried. "Tag you're it!" Her arms turned into katana blades. She tried to slice them but they dodged and escaped. They were frightened. "I can't handle another second of this man!" Waddle Dee said. He tossed himself through the window, leaving a wide opening for the others to escape. They all leaped out and towards the village.

They slowly opened the door to Sakura's house. "Sakura?" Naruto called. "Yes Naruto?" she replied. Sakura sounded a bit different; she was hiding in the shadows. "Hey, are you okay?" Sonic asked. "Never felt better…" Sakura answered. Tails freaked. "Everyone out of the house!" Tails cried. Everyone ran but Rock Lee, who tripped over the tentacle of her symbiote form. Sonic slammed the door. "We're doomed!" Sonic cried. "Sonic remain calm!" Tails cried. "Everything's going to be okay, right Naruto?" Naruto's mouth was foaming and he was covered in a glowing yellow slime. "The symbiote got him!" Kirby hollered. The remaining few dashed to a near by forest. Knuckles fell into a symbiote filled pit that appeared at the entrance. "Knuckles!" Sonic cried. "Why does this keep happening to me?" Tails shouted. The remaining three were cornered by the millions upon millions of symbiote controlled humans.

"We're totally screwed!" Sonic screamed. "Good-bye friends!" Kirby cried. "I'll remember the good years we had together." "But it's only been a few weeks!" Tails cried. Just when they thought they were doomed, Jet flew out of the shrubbery with blue symbiote covering his entire body except for the head. "Eat antidote symbiote scum!" Jet cried. "No offense buddy…" "None taken." the blue symbiote replied. He blasted the possessed people with orange spray. The symbiote screamed and turned to dust. Everyone was on the ground unconscious. Jet landed and snickered. "Who's your daddy?" Jet asked. Sonic, Tails and Kirby twitched their eyes. "What's going on?" Sonic asked. Jet explained how the symbiote called Blaze decided to help him out of his sticky situation. So the remaining four had to take all the people back towards the hospital and had to take care of them for two straight weeks. Jet gained a new partner, everyone's happy…blah…blah…blah The End!

Thank you for reading Sonic's Scary Stuff. Keep in touch for another coming whenever I feel like making one! Stay Tuned for Chapter 5 coming soon!


	5. Sonic's Halloween Night

Another Sonic and Kirby Halloween Special

This is just like any other Halloween you little kids experience…Sonic and Kirby style! Enjoy.

Sonic and pals came from another great Halloween party. Sonic had at least 12 lbs. of candy, Tails had 20 lbs; and Knuckles an astonishing 40 lbs. "You know this is much better than last year's Halloween." Sonic said.

Last Year's Halloween:

Sonic was dressed as a ghost (nothing more than a sheet with holes). He knocked on the door. A young girl, at least the same age as he was came to the door. "I'm a ghooost!" Sonic moaned. "Though the lousy ghost act is lame, do not be fooled! Now all you need to do is give me sex and some chocolates and I'll be gone!" The girl slapped the sheet off Sonic and slammed the door. "Aw, crap…" Sonic groaned. "That's the third one tonight…"

Naruto, Tenten and Neji came in with a bag full of candies. Cream walked in with a sad look on her face. If you want to know what happened, it just so happened she stowed away with Amy as well. "Cream what's wrong?" Sonic asked. "I…I didn't get any candy!" Cream sobbed. "N…no one w…w…would join me for trick or treating!" "Alright Cream, I'll go trick or treating with you." Sonic replied. Cream leaped up. "Really? You'll go with me?" Cream asked. "Sure, you guys stay here while I take Cream out to trick or treat!" Sonic replied. He grabbed Cream and dashed outside to help her trick or treat.

Jet, Blaze and Sakura ran in with at least 50 lbs. of candy! "Hey Tails…" Jet asked. "Yeah what is it?" Tails replied. "I realized that some girls are far to obsessed with their weight." Jet answered. "They gain five pounds and they freak out!" "What's that supposed to mean!" Sakura cried putting her hands on her hips and turning red in the face. Tenten gave a low growl of tremendous anger and frustration. "All I'm saying is that you girls are almost all the same." Jet replied. "I bet you couldn't even eat 70 lbs. of candy!" "I bet you anything I could!" Sakura growled. "Okay then!" Jet said. "If you can eat 70- 100 lbs. of candy, then I'll do your Christmas shopping for this year. However if you lose, then you have to do my dirty laundry for a year!" Sakura remembered how dirty Jet and Blaze's laundry is and gagged. "You have yourself a deal!" Sakura said firmly. Jet picked up three piles of candy: one pile was 40 lbs; the other 50 lbs; and finally the last being 10 lbs. "Eat all this candy and you don't have to worry about Christmas shopping this year!" Jet cried. Sakura immediately started eating. Everyone was saying go, go, go…

Sonic and Cream were walking to their fiftieth house of the night. Cream's bag was full of candy to last her three years. "This is the last house of tonight Cream." Sonic said. "Thank you very much Sonic!" Cream replied. "Aw, it was nothing…" Sonic answered. Cream knocked on the door, a very mean and not to mention rude man slammed the door open. "What do you brats want?" He asked. "Trick or Treat!" Cream hollered and held out her bag of candy. "I'm not giving my candy to a rotten little big-eared rabbit kid!" He hollered. Sonic walked up. "What's your problem?" Sonic asked. "Do I have to kick your sorry ass?" "Bring it on hedgehog!" the man answered. Sonic growled and started beating the tar out of the man for three straight hours. Sonic held his hand out. "Candy, now!" Sonic growled. The man handed him the candy and slammed the door shut. Sonic turned to Cream. "Sorry about that Cream, here's your candy." Sonic put the candy in her bag. Cream smiled and gave Sonic a big hug. "Thanks Sonic!" Cream said. They dashed for home.

Sakura had finished two and a half piles of candy and going. However Sakura was feeling a little sick and light headed now. Jet was looking determined. Neji turned to Jet. "You're looking a little calm." Neji said cocking his eyebrow. "Nothing to worry about Neji, she'll throw up all that candy in no time!" Jet replied. Two more hours passed and she had three pieces of candy left to eat. Sakura wasn't sure though that she could finish the final two pieces of candy. "Sakura looks ready to explode…" Blaze said. "Or possibly throw up." Jet replied. Sakura's mouth filled with vomit as her stomach rejected all that candy. Finally hit the breaking point. She blasted all the candy up in chunks. Blaze threw up at the sight of it, Neji turned green, Naruto stuck his tongue out in disgust, Tenten just turned her head away and Jet smirked. "Well Sakura…" Jet began. "Don't be late for your laundry day tomorrow morning." Sakura groaned and clenched her stomach. Sonic and Cream waltzed in and found puke all over the floor. "Jet the hawk! This has your name written all over it!" Sonic cried. "You're going to clean this mess up immediately!"

Jet groaned and Sakura smirked. "Guess there's something good out of this after all." Sakura said with a grin and clenched her stomach again and walked home. Jet took a mop and cleaned the mess up.

Hope you enjoyed another Halloween special of The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and Kirby. Stay tuned for chapter 6 coming soon!


	6. Kitty Grudge

The Kitty Grudge

A quick parody I made up. Hope you enjoy it.

Sonic and his friends were taking a leisurely stroll through the Hidden Leaf Village. Tails was holding his new equipment gear while Sonic was snacking on a chili dog. Knuckles spotted a white cat and walked towards it. "Well, well hello little fella!" Knuckles said. "What're you doing here?" Knuckles reached his palm out and suddenly the cat scratched Knuckles, dashed at Tails, and nabbed his gear. Then he climbed up a tall tree and hissed at them. "THAT DAMN CAT SCRATCHED ME!!!" Knuckles hollered. "THAT CAT TOOK MY NEW EQUIPMENT GEAR!" Tails yelled. "Guys calm down." Sonic said. "We'll just do this the old fashioned way!" Sonic put on a Jason mask and took out a chainsaw, ready to cut down the tree. Just then Ino stopped him. "What're you crazy!?" Ino cried. "That tree is legendary. It's five hundred years old!" Sonic blinked then turned around, ready to cut it down again. Knuckles punched him in the face. "Sorry Ino." Knuckles muttered. "Sonic's not the best listener."

What Happened Back Then…?

Sonic was in Station Square with a detonator ready to explode in ten seconds. "Sonic cut the blue wire!" The President cried. "CUT THE BLUE WIRE!" "Alright then Mr. President." Sonic muttered. "I'll cut the yellow wire." "Sonic NOOOOOOO!!!" The President wailed.

Snip.

BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!

The explosion heard around the world!

Sonic blinked. "Well, at least I can spell!" "Spell dog." Knuckles said. "D-A-W-G, DOG!" Sonic cried. "Can we try and get my gear down?" Tails wailed. "Alright, alright Tails." Sonic muttered. "I've gotten out of stickier situations!"

A stickier Situation.

Sonic was trapped between two closing walls that threatened to crush him. "This is alright." Sonic said calmly. "There's a stick holding them together, I'll make it out." The sticks broke and the walls were closing in faster now. "Alright now I'll scream!" Sonic cried. He screamed.

Knuckles got a ladder and put it up to the tree. Sonic climbed up and slowly reached for the gear. The cat hissed and took out a flamethrower. "Oh, who gives a cat a flamethrower?!?" Sonic whined. The cat chuckled and burned Sonic, leaving him smelling like ashes. "Oh now it's on!" Sonic cried. He dashed up the tree and leaped for the cat. Suddenly the cat gave him the cute puppy eyes. Sonic came to a halt. "Aw, you poor kitty!" Sonic said. "Let's get you down now!" Sonic picked up the kitty and dashed down at blazing speeds. The cat got burned, leaving him a smoking ash pile. Sonic stopped, gave Tails the gear and then looked down at the kitty. Sonic gasped. "Kitty! You've been burned!" Sonic wailed. "WHY!?! THIS IS THE SECOND WORST DAY OF MY LIFE!"

First worst day of his life.

Sonic was walking towards the chili dog store and noticed the sign saying:

CHILI DOG STORE CLOSED FOR NEW BARNEY STORE.

Sonic gasped and turned around. "Hello again Mr. Hedgehog!" Barney said in a cutesy voice. He skipped towards Sonic and hugged him. Sonic fainted. "No…" Sonic whispered.

Sonic walked to the graveyard and put the ash pile known as the kitty in there. "Sonic…I want to know if…" Tails couldn't finish his sentence. Sonic turned around and hushed Tails. "Let's go home and mourn the death of kitty!" Sonic cried. They walked home. Tails looked up at the sign and whimpered. It read:

PET SEMATARY DO NOT BURY ANYONE HERE!

The kitty's hand burst from the ground and felt the cold round on top.

This is not good! Stay Tuned for Chapter 7 coming soon.


	7. Kitty Returns!

Kitty Returns! (pt.1)

That evil kitty is back from the dead! Sorry it took me so long to update…I figured it would be better if I did the next chapter Halloween weekend.

Everyone was bored out of their minds. Oh, sure it was a nice day outside, but everyone was bored. Sonic played with a yo-yo, Tails tinkered with machinery and Knuckles was doing a couple of rounds on his exercise robot. Jet burst into the room along with Kirby and Naruto. "Hey everybody," Jet said with excitement. "Guess what I won?" "Is it a trip to the hairdresser?" Sonic asked. "You could use a new hair-do…copycat." Jet gave Sonic the evil eye, "No, I won a trip for some of my friends to stay at a new mansion for two days!" "Oh no," Tails groaned. "Another haunted mansion…" Naruto cocked an eyebrow in confusion. Tails sighed, "Well it went pretty much like this…"

The Last Mansion

Sonic, Tails, Jet and Knuckles were standing at the door of an evil mansion complete with evil laughter and ghosts. They entered the room to find kids being tortured. Like when Peter made that excuse for not getting reservations for Stewie's birthday party, it was something like that. "Here sir," A kid said. "I have twenty tickets!" "Oh terribly sorry," the man mocked. "But you need one more ticket to live…" A hole appeared under the boy and he fell down towards a lion pit. "Excuse me sir," Tails asked. "Is this the free mansion we won?" The man turned to them and grinned, "Of course…this is the mansion!" Jet and the other took a step back ready to leave, but the man wrapped them in rope. Tails' eyes narrowed, "You better let me go…you won't like me when I'm angry!" His eyes went red and he went to Incredible Hulk size.

"Tails it didn't happen like that," Sonic muttered. "You screamed like a girl and hopped towards the exit like crazy." Tails grinned and turned red. A bit later at the mansion, Jet, along with Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Naruto, Kirby, Hinata, Ino, Sakura, Kiba, Neji and Shikamaru were standing at the entrance with wide eyes. "Well what're we waiting for," Shikamaru asked. "Let's go inside so I can get a nap." They entered to be greeted by a butler with a dog's head, which was missing an eye. Hinata gagged at the sight of his dead looking face. The butler just bowed and signaled for them to go to their rooms for a bit while dinner gets ready. Knuckles was getting his shoes and gloves tidied up for the dinner when a freaky man with a freaky arm came and greeted Knuckles. "Um, your arm is disfigured…" Knuckles said with a hint of disgust. The man just smiled and motioned for him to follow him to the dining room where the others were sitting down to eat.

Everyone was eating a bowl of ramen (Which happens to be Naruto's favorite). Naruto was on his fifth bowl and everyone else was getting up from the table. "Naruto aren't you stuffed yet?" Tails asked. "When it comes to ramen, he's never stuffed." Sakura answered. The others left leaving Naruto by himself to finish up. A little later, Sakura was getting all set for bed. A cat whose fur was burnt walked into the room. Sakura jerked her head back in disgust, "You're one ugly cat…" Sakura grumbled. The cat hissed and he sticked up the finger at Sakura. Her mouth was gaping wide open, in her shock; the cat leaped at Sakura and scratched her forehead. She reacted quickly by throwing the cat at the door. The cat hissed and took a threatening step towards her. "Now there little kitty," Sakura said fearfully. "You're a cute cat…" The cat stopped and stared. "Ugly but cute…" She added. The cat's eyes popped wide open and out of nowhere, took out a beer bottle, smashed and held the top end with the sharp edges of the end viciously. Sakura cried out, the cat leaped and was slowly making the bottle try and cut her neck. Sakura flipped the cat on his back and tried to cut its neck. The cat rolled out of the grip and grabbed the chair. It hissed and smashed Sakura over the head. She growled and held her fists up. "You wanna piece of this?!" Sakura cried. The cat leaped on the night table and held his paws up like fists. Sakura hit the cat with her fists, the cat returned the favor, harder, and Sakura went back two feet. "Is that the best you got!?" Sakura cried. "C'mon and give me your best!" The cat smirked and did an uppercut to Sakura sending her flying in the air. Sakura landed wiping the blood off her mouth. The cat reared back, and in a Rocky style way punched Sakura out. Cameras were flashing and the cat held his paws up in the air in a victory style pose. Sakura blacked out.

"You got your ass beaten by a cat," Sonic smirked. "Man, that's embarrassing." "The cat was a homicidal maniac," Sakura said hoarsely. "I wouldn't do all this to myself now would I?!" Naruto looked confused, Sonic was snoozing and Kiba was nodding slowly. "So, let me get this straight," Neji started. "You were in your room, a cat came in, you called it ugly, the cat gave you the finger, and he scratched you, and then took out a beer bottle..." Sonic couldn't help but laugh. "Then you were smashed over the head with a chair, beaten up, Rocky style, and finally given a finishing blow…" Everyone stared and then just laughed out loud. Sakura slumped down and turned red. _That was really embarrassing_, Sakura thought. _You could've done way better than that…_

Sonic walked through the hallway to his room and heard a few footsteps behind him and a laugh all too familiar. Sonic shivered and moved faster, the footsteps moved faster. He moved at his fastest and slammed the door shut and exhaled a sigh of relief. "Hello again hedgehog, wanna play?" Sonic's eyes snapped wide open. Once again, Barney stood in front of him, arms open wide ready to hug him for the third time in a row. 'Not this time!" Sonic cried. He searched desperately for a Barney seeking missile and found one. He threw it at the big purple dinosaur, and unbelievably, he did the matrix (That's impossible for a big fat tub of lard to do). Sonic's eyes were wide as Barney ran up the wall and evaded the missile, which blew up in front of a wall. He then leaped for Sonic. Sonic's eyes widened even more a he desperately tried to unlock the door. But once again he was too late and you guessed it, he hugged Sonic, whose eyes rolled back into his head.

Will Sonic ever get that dinosaur off his back? Find out in part 2!


	8. Kitty Returns! Part 2!

Kitty Returns! (pt.2)

I know it's been awhile now, but with all these fan fics I'm working on, it's hard to update this wacky story. I guarantee though that I'll finish the Christmas special in time. Here's part 2 of Kitty Returns.

Sonic limped into Tails' room, trembling from the dreaded hug of Barney. His eyes were bloodshot from his horrid escape, and he was a little pale. "Um…Sonic," Tails asked. "What's wrong with you?" Sonic's eye twitched, "Oh nothing. Just that when I thought I wouldn't have to see that damn purple nightmare these kids call educational, he comes back!" Tails just stared at Sonic, his eyebrow cocked. Knuckles came dashing in. "Hey Sonic, remember the cat that died from your blazing speed?" Knuckles asked. Sonic nodded. "Well, he's back…AS A ZOMBIE!!!!" Sonic and Tails flinched, "A zombie!?" Shikamaru came in with wide eyes. "RUN FOR YOUR DAMN LIVES!!!" He cried. "THERE'S A HOMICIDAL CAT ON THE LOOSE IN THE MANSION!" "So what?" Sonic asked. "We supposed to be afraid?" "…with a _chainsaw_!" Shikamaru added. The three heroes leaped back as the zombie cat came blasting through the door laughing maniacally with a chainsaw in hand.

"Kitty! It's you!" Sonic cried in a cutesy voice. "I'm sorry I killed you!" Kitty hissed and took out a machine gun. "Okay everyone let's run like hell!" Tails wailed. "Alright then!" Sonic cried. "But let's have some cool scary music to go with it!" He took out his Ipod and suddenly this music came on…

_Girls just wanna have fun, yeah!_

_Girls just wanna have fun!_

Everyone, including kitty, were staring at him in disgust. Sonic smiled and turned on music that was on the original Scooby-Doo music. Everyone was running through random doors like crazy. Soon everything was all out of control.

Finally, Sonic and the others hid themselves into the closet where they found Kiba and Naruto hiding from the same cat. "Where are the others?" Sonic asked. "They found the exit and went home." Naruto whispered. "Sakura escaped too, but not without a few more bruises to remember that zombie cat bye." "Why didn't you guys get out?!" Knuckles whispered furiously. "He locked the door and ate the key." Kiba replied. Suddenly, a chainsaw was heard and kitty burst in hissing like crazy holding the chainsaw up like a suicidal killer. The boys screamed and luckily, they found a trap door…that took them outside the castle. "Huh, that was easier than Tails' instruction video." Sonic said with relief

Tails' instruction video

Step 1: pull laces up

Step 2: Do a loop-de-loop and fold

Sonic was stumped, "Tails why did you make this how to tie shoelaces instruction video so hard to follow?" Tails rolled his eyes and shook his head.

Sonic and the others were at Kirby's house playing games on a stormy night. "That was one scary night." Sonic wailed. "Jet next time you win something, don't bring us along." "I'm just glad we don't have to deal with the homicidal cat and that purple freak anymore." Tails muttered. Outside the window, Barney and kitty were outside. "That's what they think…" Barney whispered to kitty. The two then laughed maniacally. Kitty sighed and then said to Barney in a fashion designer's voice, "You know what? This gets pretty old, killing people and all. Let's just have some coffee on me." "Sounds good to me." Barney replied.


	9. Sonic and Kirby's Christmas Special pt1

It's a Sonic and Kirby Christmas Special! (pt.1)

Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Kirby were setting up the Christmas tree. "Alright Tails, Santa's going to come tonight!" Sonic said. "ALRIGHT SANTA CLAUSE'S COMING!!!" Tails hollered. "I'M GOING TO GET MY PRESENTS!!!" Kirby cocked an eyebrow. Sonic chuckled, "He's eight years old, what do you expect?" Tails was jumping up and down. "Man, I haven't seen Tails this happy since that time he got his driver's license." Knuckles muttered.

Tails' Driver's License

Tails was seen on the race track, going crazy. "WOOHOO, YEAH BABY!!" Tails hollered. "Hey Sonic, look at me now you cocky arrogance! I'm moving faster than you!" Tails then went out of control and crashed at the curb. Tails was screaming like a little girl now. "MOMMY, I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK BEHIND YOUR BACK AGAIN!!!" Tails screamed. Sonic was holding back laughter. The car caught fire and Tails jumped out. "I'm _alive_!" Tails cried. "I'M ALIVE!!!" A heavenly light poured on Tails. Then the car exploded, sending the vehicle flying skywards, before plummeting, back to Earth and crushing Tails. Sonic couldn't help but laugh out loud…for twenty straight minutes. Everyone was staring in wide-eyed horror, while Sonic went laughing…

Naruto, Neji and Sasuke were at the door wearing their winter clothes. "Merry Christmas everybody!" Naruto cried. Kirby waved and walked off getting the food ready. Meanwhile, King Dedede was napping when suddenly; he felt a surge of urgency. "Food senses…are tingling!" He cried. "Christmas dinner…but that means…FOOOODDDD!!!" He blasted through the castle walls and dashed for Kirby's house.

The house was rocking, and everyone knew who it was. "Oh my goodness, it's him!" Kirby cried. "Everyone, barricade the doors!" Everyone quickly put dressers, tables, doors, cows, pigs, and anything else they could find to barricade the door. Everyone then gave a sigh of relief. Suddenly, King Dedede smashed through the walls and screamed, "FOOOOODDD!!!" He sprinted towards the dinner and was ready to gobble it up until Kirby smacked a giant metal muzzle, complete with cut wires to electrocute him if he tried to take it off. "No food until the party!" Sonic cried. "Or else we'll burn your mouth off that fat face of yours!" "At least we don't have to worry about anyone else ruining the party." Sasuke said. Suddenly, Chouji burst through the barricaded doors. "My food senses…stronger than ever!" He muttered. He then saw the food and ate every last bite. "And thus, I stand corrected." Sasuke groaned. "Aw, man." Sonic grumbled. "I haven't been in a worse situation like this since the time I tried out for that DreamWorks movie."

The DreamWorks movie

Sonic was listening in on the director's instructions. "Then you come and run from the bear." The director said in an enthusiastic voice. Sonic nodded and the director cried, "ACTION!" The bear chased after Sonic, while Sonic screamed like crazy. Then, Sonic took out a pistol and shot him in the head. "CUT!" The director shouted. "This is a family film! Not an R-rated movie! This is Over the Hedge!" Sonic flinched. "This is Over the Hedge? I thought it was Open Season!" Sonic shouted. "I was going to try out as that hunter who wants to kill all the animals in the world." The director sighed. "You want me to bring the big purple dude out?" Sonic screamed like a little girl. "NOOOOO! Anybody, but _him, PLEASSE! ANYBODY BUT HIM!" _

Everyone was making their way to the food market to buy some extra food for the stuff Chouji devoured. "I hate grocery stores for a variety of reasons…" Sonic started. "For one, it's too crowded, two, there's too much things to choose from, three…" Sonic never got to finish because he saw a sign reading: CHILI DOG SALE! EXTRA CHEESE AND ONINONS INCLUDED FOR $1.19!!! Sonic's mouth was watering (because we all know Sonic loves chilidogs). "Okay, you know what? Let's go!" Sonic cried. Everyone rolled their eyes, including King Dedede and Chouji, both with muzzles on. _That's Sonic for ya…_ Knuckles muttered in his head.

Jet, Blaze, Storm, Wave, and Waddle Dee were in the electronics section, searching for games and anything else that might amuse Tails. "Okay, let's see what we got…" Waddle Dee started. "We got the new N-sync CD for Rock Lee, that new toy that Naruto wants, which includes ninja training action, a hand-made Sasuke doll for Sakura and Ino, a hand-made Naruto doll for Hinata, spy goggles for Knuckles, new boards for these guys I know…oh yeah and a 'This game is freakin' sweet' DVD board game for Sonic. Now the next thing we need is…oh my…god!" Waddle Dee's eyes popped wide open. "What is it?" Blaze asked. "What does Tails want for Christmas?" Jet walked over and looked at the paper. He gasped, "T-Tails…h-he w-wants a Nintendo Wii for Christmas!" Jet hollered eyes popping wide open. "Oh come on guys, it's not that expensive." Wave muttered. "B-but Wave there's only one copy left of it." Storm moaned. Everyone looked to see the Wii, clear on the shelf for everyone to see.

They ran in slow motion style, the Wii just in their grasp, they could almost taste it. Their hand touched it, then another hand touched it too it was…the accursed red teletubbie! "Eh-oh!" It cried as he grabbed the Wii, ready to dash off. Jet then jumped him, pounding on his head. The teletubbie punched him off then his red antenna went a darker red, and then zapped a laser. Jet quickly dodged. "Whoa, you don't see that everyday in an episode of Teletubbies." Storm said. Everyone gave Storm a stare of disgust. Storm gave a quick glance back, "Not that…I would know…" He muttered. Jet and that red teletubbie were fighting not knowing that someone else was quickly grabbing the Wii. They glanced as they heard the sound of the register. It was…Super-bunny from Rayman Raving Rabbids. He gave everyone a glance then shouted his outrageous war cry and sprinted off.

Jet was weeping now, still kicking the teletubbie. "No…no…no…it can't be…" Jet wailed. "Outsmarted by a bunny rabbit!" "How are we going to get Tails' present now?" Waddle Dee asked.


	10. Sonic and Kirby's Christmas Special pt2

It's a Sonic and Kirby Christmas Special (pt.2)

As Sonic and the others were searching for the food that Chouji ate, Tails was hopping about looking everywhere for…the turkey. Just as Tails was turning a corner, he spotted the mother of Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. As always though, there was one left (dun-dun-duuuuunnnnn!). Tails spotted another person, a black hedgehog with red stripes on his spiky hair-do. "Shadow the Hedgehog?!" Tails cried. "What're you doing here?" "Well, I kind of burned the food in a fire…" Shadow said in an 'I need to think of an excuse' tone of voice. "Well actually, I purposely burned the food in…Orochimaru's house…so here I am. Sonic was sprinting, looking for chili dogs. "Chili dog, Chili dogs, where are my chili dogs!?!" Sonic screamed. When he spotted Shadow, he screamed like a little girl, but then he covered it up with a more manly voice. "Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in!" Sonic said.

"Oh, shut up you faker!" Shadow cried. "You're not the fastest in the world, I am! I always will be. I'm as popular as Pokemon was back in the late 1990s. But now, Pokemon's gay, and I'm not about to end up like those washed up critters were!"

How did they end up?

Pikachu is seen with a cigarette, looking like a junkie, along with all the other Pokemon. "Dude, pull my finger." Totadile muttered to Bulbasaur. "Why should I?" Bulbasaur muttered back. "Because, I told you to you hoar!" Totadile cried. "Now pull my finger Dammit!" Bulbasaur pulled his finger and a long fart could be heard. Nobody minded. "Heh, heh, heh, heh…" Totadile grinned.

Sonic and Shadow were dashing towards each other in a Dragon Ball Z style look. Tails was looking in pure enjoyment, then…a slap fight. Sonic and Shadow were slapping each other rapidly. Tails just stared in disgust. Sonic punched Shadow and grabbed the turkey. He then sprinted off. "Come back you bastards!" Shadow hollered. "Come here and take your beating like a man…err…hedgehog!!!" Sonic and Tails then paid for their turkey and left along with Naruto, Sasuke, Neji and a muzzled King Dedede and Chouji. "Well, that's everything on the list boys." Sonic cheered. "Good job everybody." Suddenly the mission complete music from the Sonic Adventure series could be heard. The ranking showed up: B. "We got a B?!?" Naruto cried. "C'mon people lets try to do better next time!"

Jet, Wave, Storm, Waddle Dee and Blaze were walking slowly out of the store. "We lost the Wii to a bunny rabbit." Jet wept. "A retarded bunny-rabbit got the Wii…" The red teletubbie came limping out, black bruised and bleeding from his ordeal. Just when he was behind them, Storm punched him out cold. "That's for making a stupid show on television." Storm cried. "One that I watch 24/7 every month!" Everyone stared at Storm. "I meant I watch Family Guy every Sunday Ha! Ha! Ha!" Storm said nervously. "Alright everybody this is perfectly fine." Waddle Dee said in his hippie tone of voice. "Like, there are plenty of stores still filled with those wonderful Wii systems!" Kirby walked out of Toys R' Us, giving everyone a glance of confusion. "What's everybody sad about?" Kirby asked. "We lost the Wii to a stupid bunny rabbit." Wave muttered. "That screwy wabbit!" Blaze cried. "Um…yeah I probably should've told you this but…" Kirby started. "I reserved a copy in case this happened. Jet instantly got out of his gloomy state and hugged Kirby. "Thanks Kirby, you're a life saver!" Jet cried. Do you realize what Tails would've done with me?" "What?" Kirby asked.

What Tails would've done…

Tails was walking into Jet's room and placed a 10 000 volt wire under Jet's bed and placed his board under there. "Tails, have you seen my board?" Jet asked. "It should be under the bed!" Tails answered.

"That's just harsh…" Kirby said in a sorry tone. "Which reminds me…" Waddle Dee muttered. "How did you get here?" "Well, I walked from the grocery store and decided to go get the Wii…" "Do you have it?" Wave asked. "Yeah, I did." Kirby answered. He held up a bag with the box of the next-gen system. Jet had tears of joy in his eyes, a heavenly light poured on the six heroes as they marveled at the Wii. "Okay, let's go before we get shot for one of these things…" Storm cheered.

Later that night, everyone was exchanging gifts for Christmas day. "One present you open now…" Sonic announced. He then muttered, "Choose wisely…" He then gave an evil chuckle. Then they had a big Christmas dinner, which King Dedede and Chouji ate while screaming, "FOOOOOODDDDD!!!!" So everyone had to eat leftover pizza and some chicken wings. Eventually, everyone went to sleep with a bit of insomnia. Sonic and Naruto opened the door to Guy sensei's room. "Hey, hey Guy sensei." Naruto whispered. "You awake?" "I am now…" Guy muttered. "What do you want?" "Is it Christmas yet Guy?" Sonic whispered cheerfully. "It's three thirty in the morning, go to bed." Guy muttered. When Guy's woken in the night, he's a bit cranky… "C'mon it's after three so…" Naruto trailed off. "Just go to bed you jack-asses!" Guy shouted. Sonic and Naruto sprinted back to their rooms.

At Christmas day, everyone opened presents. Jet got himself a brand new board from Knuckles. Jet was crying, "Thank you so much!" Knuckles just sighed. Tails ripped open his present and screamed. "A Wii, I got a Nintendo Wii!" Tails cried. He ran up to Kirby and hugged him. "YOU'RE THE BEST! I'LL NEVER FORGET YOU!!!" Kirby gasped. "You're welcome…" Kirby choked. "Just let go of me!" Tails released Kirby. Sonic couldn't find a single present for him under the tree. Sonic sighed and was ready to walk outside when he heard an all too familiar voice.

"Sonic, is that you?"

Sonic spun around to find Sally, his girlfriend, along with Rotor, Mina Mongoose, Antoine, Bunnie Rabbot, Fiona Fox and Julie-Su. "Sally it's you!" Sonic exclaimed. Tails was drooling over Fiona, and Jet just stared at Mina, preoccupied by the many asking questions. "She's hot!" Jet whispered. "Yeah, how'd you get here?" Knuckles muttered. "Well, you'll have to thank Blaze and Shadow." Rotor said. Everyone looked to see Blaze and Shadow at the doorway. "Gee, thanks Shadow and Blaze!" Sonic said. Shadow just forced a smile on his face, while Blaze the cat sighed. "Wait! The symbiote Blaze and the cat Blaze, how are we supposed to know the difference?" Storm cried. "We'll just call the symbiote…Flames then…" Jet replied.

Shadow decided to join the crew at this point, along with Blaze the cat. Just remember, the symbiote is now called Flames. Sonic loved his present, and shared a kiss with Princess Sally under the mistletoe. "WOOOOOOOH!!!" The Totadile junkie cried out. "Oh, shut up!" A voice cried out. It then threw a beer bottle at him. So now, some of the Freedom Fighters have joined the crew. Plus, Sonic and Shadow formed a truce. Normally, they would've been fighting DBZ style, but I guess they made up. At least it's better than that team-up Blaze the cat had with Paula Abdul.

Lyrics for Opposites Attract can be heard. We see Blaze dancing around Paula as she sang:

_I Take Two Steps Forward_

Blaze then sang:

_I Take Two Steps Back_

_Cuz I'm A Cat!_

_And you know it ain't-fiction_

_Just a natural fact_

_We go together_

_Cuz I'm a freakin' cool cat!_

Any who, now the Christmas special is over. All of you have a good two weeks off. "Now get lost!" Sonic shouted. He then started laughing. "Just kidding!" Then he sighed and said in a darker tone, "No seriously, get lost."


	11. Tails gets revenge And Sonic Rebuilds

Tails gets Revenge And Sonic Makes a Bigger House

Sonic and Tails were walking on the streets during Boxing Day. It wasn't much of a white Christmas, but at least the craze is over. "Yeah, this is great." Sonic started. "Sally and the others are here, it's better than the time I danced on stage with a million showgirls…" Tails just cocked an eyebrow and then said, "Nothing can possibly ruin this moment." Just then, two ninjas from the Hidden Leaf Village were standing by Sonic's house, smoking a cigarette. "Hey man, throw your cigarette over at that house." One said. He threw the cigarette towards the house, which landed three feet from the house. Suddenly, it ignited. "Oh, god!" The other cried. "That house is on fire, we had nothing, I mean, nothing to do with it!" The two ran off. Sonic and Tails looked as the house burned to the ground. "My house!" Sonic exclaimed. "My Wii!!!" Tails cried. "My Nintendo Wii!"

Sonic and Tails were crashing at Kirby's house for the time being. "Our house was burned to the ground, this is worse than the time Shadow lost his contact lenses."

Shadow was looking around frantically for his contact lenses while lasers blasted from his eyes. "Alright everybody, nobody move." Shadow hollered while moving his hands around the ground searching for the lenses. "Nobody move whatsoever and nobody will be disintegrated…Rouge is going to kill me."

"My Wii has been destroyed…" Tails muttered. "Those bastards will pay with money!" (Evil ominous sound). Sonic had gone to Naruto's house to ask for help in building a new home. "Yeah, so will you help?" Sonic asked. "Sure, thing Sonic." Naruto replied. "But where's Tails?" Sonic just shrugged. "I dunno said something about getting revenge on the guys that destroyed his Wii." Naruto gave a stare of worry to Sonic. "He's gonna kill them isn't he?" Naruto muttered. "Yes, yes he is." Sonic muttered back.

"Should we do something about it?"

The two just thought for a moment…

"Best we don't just leave him alone…" Sonic whispered.

The two idiots who burned Sonic's house were lying in their beds chilling with a cigarette. "Think anybody noticed we accidentally burned that hedgehog's house down?" One said. "Probably not." The other said. "But it was worse than the time we blasted Angelina Jolene's house down…she's got enormous lips." Tails walked in with a calm look on his face. "So, did you get the money?" Tails asked. "What money?" One of them said. "We don't owe you any money!" Tails just nodded. "I see, that's alright!" Tails cried. He sipped a glass of orange juice and stopped. "Pretty good OJ, eh?" Tails asked. The two nodded, then Tails threw the empty glass cup into one of their faces, leaving him screaming in pain. "What's your problem!?!" The other guy asked furiously. Tails just growled and punched the other into a wall and started beating the tar out of the both of them with wind-up punches and kicks, all the while asking, Where's my money? Then he left them battered on the ground. "I want the money by five 'o' clock in the evening, after that, you're dead!" Tails shouted. "You're pure evil!" One of them cried out in pain. "You're worse than Gaara himself!" "Oh, go beat yourselves up!" Tails replied.

Sonic and Naruto had managed to finish half of the house in no time flat, thanks to Sonic's speed of course. "Yeah the house looks great now!" Naruto said. "This should take just a few more hours to finish, possibly a few more minutes with some extra help." Sonic thought for a moment, then an idea hit him. "I have an idea!" Sonic cried. "You're going to call for some extra help?" Naruto asked. "No, I'm going to order some chili dogs!" Sonic replied cheerfully. The phone rang and then came the voice of a young woman. "Hello, and welcome to Chili Dog Paradise." She said. "How may we serve you?" "Yeah I'll have forty chili dogs and the super deluxe chili platter with extra cheese." Sonic requested. "And the Ramen special for my little friend here." "Okay, we'll be here in fifteen minutes." The women replied. Naruto just rolled his eyes back. "You have speed, but there's no way of getting rid of your chili dog addiction is there?" Sonic shook his head.

The two guys were passing by the town square when they saw Tails, playing some chess with Shino. They gasped and then went into an alley and put fake mustaches on. They walked past Tails and said, "Hello." "Oh hello there guys." Tails muttered. Then Tails instantly checked his watch: 5:03. "What the…?" Tails shouted. He ran towards the guys and kicked them down some nearby stairs, leaving them bleeding. Tails walked down and smashed their faces into nearby vases and asked, "Where's my money?" He then left them on the ground for a second to recover. "That does it!" The duo cried. "We're going to defeat you right now!" Just before they got up, Tails got a pistol out of nowhere and shot the two in their left leg.

They cried in pain. "Why doesn't anyone here help!?!" They cried. The crowd was there and they just stared and said, "You crazy? That two tailed fox would kill us!" Tails then shot them in their right leg. "Wait Tails!" One of the two said said. "We'll get you the money okay? We'll…" He didn't get to finish because he gave a cry of surprise for out of nowhere, Tails had a flamethrower and pulled the trigger. He burned the two into barbequed duo. Tails walked towards them and cried, "Tell me your name! It gets annoying when the author has to say the guy or the other said!" "My name's Fred." said the one with orange hair. "I'm Blizzard." said the one with ice blue hair. "Yes, that's much better." Tails said with a sigh of relief. Sonic walked over with the Nintendo Wii box. "Hey, Tails, you're so lucky you didn't open the Wii yet!" Sonic hollered. "The box is fire-proof; it's the only thing that survived the fire, along with your Nintendo Wii!"

Tails glanced nervously at the two KO'd people on the streets. "Oh, so the box…was...f…fireproof…" Tails stammered. He gave a nervous chuckle then sprinted off. Sonic then glanced at the crowd and smiled. "My big debut!" Sonic cried. He took out a top hat and started singing a tune to the beat of Can't Touch This.

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_J-j-j-j-just like Orochimaru from Naruto_

_He's untouchable, just like me!_

_I'm so fast I make a cheetah_

_Look just like a big slow turtle!_

_I'm super-cool I'm super-sexy_

_I make the girls crawl all over me!_

_Think you're fast? Better think again!_

_There's a new fast dude in town!_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_So just remember this little tune_

_Otherwise you're just a boob!_

_Eggman could never touch me!_

_Because I had the speed of a hawk!_

_Shadow didn't stand a chance!_

_Against my wits and speed okay?_

_Think you're fast? Better think again!_

_There's a new fast dude in town!_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

_Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na_

_Can't touch me!_

"Nice song!" A local cried. "I give it an 8/10!" Sonic cheered. "Yeah! Now I can give this song to the record company! Thanks for your opinion!" Sonic walked towards his newly finished house. Everyone was staring in amazement. The house looked big enough to pack an entire group of friends. Sonic motioned for them to come in. It was your average everyday house…except for a room for everybody. Everyone was running to their new rooms. "See? This is my one-day late Christmas present for everybody!" Sonic shouted. Tails was nervously glancing at Fred and Blizzard. "So, you guys put that behind you right?" Tails asked. "That whole Wii incident never happened okay?" Fred and Blizzard cocked an eyebrow. "Wait a minute, you shoot us in the legs, then roast us with a flamethrower?" Blizzard asked. "You can do anything you want to me now!" Tails replied quickly. Fred and Blizzard gave Tails an evil look. They tied up his propeller tails and threw him off the fifth story window. "Now we're even!" Fred said. Sonic saw the whole thing and broke out laughing.

"Ah-ha! Tails got thrown out the fifth story window!" Sonic cried in laughter. Then he quickly said to the duo, "You know you're paying for that window right?" Then started laughing again. The duo then glanced at him nervously. Sonic then added in a dark tone, "Otherwise there will be some deadly consequences!" Fred and Blizzard didn't pay for it. So they got the deadly consequence: Cleaning Sonic's room. Fred and Blizzard were wearing air maks while cleaning up Sonic's garbage. "Oh, God." Fred whined. "I think i just grabbed two month old pizza!" "Keep cleaning lackies!" Sonic hollered, while holding the cat 'o' nine tails. "You've still got my closet to clean after!" Ominous music could be heard from the closet. Fred and Blizzard flinched in fear.


	12. E! True Hollywood Stories

E! True Hollywood Stories: Sonic the Hedgehog

The Following Chapter has been put into script form (Just for this chapter!) With a few normal book style formats thrown in there.

The TV turned on and the title_ E! True Hollywood Stories_ came on.

Announcer: Today on E! True Hollywood Stories, we take a look at Sonic the Hedgehog.

(A Picture of Sonic showed in which he's eating a chili dog, mouth wide-open for everyone to see.)

The announcer continued

Announcer: I'm Tom Whatsyername, and I'll be narrating this story. (Tragic music comes on). Sonic was born in the Sega studios in 1991, his parents were very pleased.

Sonic' mom: We never expected to have a baby boy…we…thought it would be a girl

A photo is shown in which a banner is on the wall saying: _It's a Girl! _Along with little girl designs and toys thrown into the background.

Sonic's mom: So we had to sell all the toys and banners back and buy all this boy stuff for him.

Sonic's dad: I was hoping it would be a boy, since I was a robot…I thought it would be some half-robot, half-hedgehog kid.

Tom: Sonic grew up to be very gifted, for one, he was super-fast.

A video is shown in which Sonic is sitting on the floor with a pacifier in his mouth staring at the camera, his mom and dad saying, come on Sonic, see the chili dog? Sonic dropped the pacifier on the ground and crawled so quickly towards his parents, they didn't have time to react. Sonic grabbed the chili dog and cried, "Chili Dogs!" His first word.

Sonic's dad: We were all surprised his first word was chili dog…I thought it would be mother or father…or even old man.

Tom: Sonic was to be a ten year old in this game, able to run and spin into a ball, Sega would quickly launch him to stardom in his first game, Sonic the Hedgehog. The game was a huge success and eventually, Sonic was a star.

Sonic: Yeah, people seem to have complete control over what age they wanted me to be, they kept me at fifteen once Sonic Adventure came out, all the way to my latest game. I was a huge success.

Tom: One year later, Sega thought it would be cool to have a two-tailed fox side-kick, so they created Miles 'Tails' Prower.

Tails: Yeah, when they first asked me to become Sonic's sidekick, I was so damn nervous, they had to cut the crap out of my fur…a nervous breakdown.

Tom: The game was perfect, now with a two-player mode, people would be playing through as Tails until Sonic the Hedgehog 3, which introduced the hothead Knuckles.

Knuckles: Yeah, it was pretty darn good to be seen in that game, however, I hated it when they made me gullible…Too easy to trick me…

Tom: Other than the games, Sonic and crew had an arsenal of TV shows, like the Sonic talk show.

Theme music from Jerry Springer is heard and Sonic's face is seen along with Tails and Knuckles. "This is the Sonic talk show!" Sonic announced. "Today's subject: Obesity!" Sonic is sitting in a Dr. Phil like position, with a fat woman sitting next to him. "Yeah, so let me get this straight." Sonic said. "Your boyfriend who you say is some guy that can stick to walls and swing on webs, was having sex with another woman?" She nodded and sobbed. "Aw, that's okay." Sonic said softly. "Let it all out…" Sonic looked around the room for a second before yelling, "Any of you want to get her an extra large pepperoni pizza before she rampages for food around here?"

Tom: By 1999, Sega decided it was time for a new look for Sonic, so they made him look more realistic and finally, the new Sonic is born!

Sonic: Yeah, so basically by now, I was simply loved by everyone…well not everyone exactly, some gang chased me crying, "Sonic SUUUCCCKKKSSS!!!"

Sally: Basically, Sonic was adored. People love the Sonic due to the thrill and excitement of running at high speeds, take that out and…well; you've got another crappy platformer.

Tom: However, Sonic would meet his match in the release of Sonic Adventure 2, the appearance of Shadow and Rouge.

Shadow: Hey, is it my fault that the people around here are so damn retarded, they thought I was Sonic? Is it? Is it my fault Sonic's just a complete idiot?

Rouge: Eh, what can I say? I'm addicted to jewelry, it's better than my addiction to chocolate I had when I was thirteen.

They show a picture of a three hundred pound bat eating chocolate. Rogue spun around. "The _hell_ is your problem?" Rogue cried. "I think the people have a picture of what it's like okay? You F#$ing retards I'll…" The channel blocked out for ten seconds with the screen:_ Please Stand By…_

Tom: However, in the year 2004, Sonic Heroes came out on PS2, Xbox, and Gamecube. Needless to say, PS2 was the worst version, disappointing PS2 Sonic fans everywhere.

Sonic: Yeah, the graphics and frame rate were plain terrible. I never knew Sega and Sonic Team would do something like that to PS2 that to graphics of Gamecube and Xbox, and you're thinking, PS2 is way stronger than that.

Tom: For the next two years Sonic would star in mediocre games, in which, Sonic's popularity would plummet thanks to the mediocre games that would come out like Sonic Riders, which wasn't all that bad, but was still considered a piece of crap.

Jet: I…I was told by Sega that me and my three extreme gear riders would be appearing in a game…it wasn't as good as I thought it would be you know?

Storm: …Am I on television? Hi mom! It's me Storm! The guy you threw out of the nest…good times…good times…

Tom: A few months after the release of that game, Sega gave players what they wanted in a game called Sonic the Hedgehog for Xbox360. There were mixed reactions and of course, most of these were crap reviews.

Sonic: I was shocked, I mean, geez! Sega finally gives the people what they want and they give it mostly crap reviews. I mean c'mon! It's like they formed the Sonic haters association.

Tom: Now Sonic is a broken hedgehog…well not really…more of a Peter Griffin type guy, stupid yet funny. Sonic will always have a place in our hearts…

They show a picture of Sonic lighting a gasoline tank before it exploded. Then another one of him connecting two rings with Shadow like the wonder twins. And finally him eating a chili dog with insane looking eyes.

Tom: This has been E! True Hollywood Stories…thank you and goodnight…


	13. Season 2

Season 2 Opener

Disclaimer: I couldn't think up much of a title. I know it's been a while but…enjoy. Another video game star is introduced (Well actually three…).

Sonic went outside early in the morning and sucked in some fresh air. "Ah, the birds are chirping, sun's up and there's a big meteor heading my way." Sonic sighed, and then his eyes popped wide open as the meteor crashed upon him. A familiar character jumped out of what was really a spaceship. His yellow hair and spiky ears…who else could it be except for Jak and Daxter! Another famous figure appeared…Ratchet and Clank! Finally, it was the floppy-eared guy Klonoa and his friends Lolo and Popka, as well as Gantz. "Well this is the place." Jak said. "Now where's Sonic…"Your spiky blue friend is under your one hundred pound ship!" Sonic cried, voice muffled by the crushing weight. Everyone quickly pushed the ship and there was Sonic, who got up and dusted himself off. "Oh, wow!" Sonic said in amazement. "That was like the movie I saw, except no one got killed!"

A bit later, Sonic and the others were sitting around their table talking about everything that happened. "So, what made you guys come for me?" Sonic asked. Jak and the others looked at each other…

So what did make them come?

Klonoa was fooling with a yo-yo, while the others were lying lazily on the couch. Jak sighed, "I'm bored…" Ratchet nodded. "Ever since Sonic left, life has been boring as hell!" "Hey, why don't we go find Sonic?" Daxter said. "That way we don't get bored and we have our comic relief to help us cheer up." So everyone got into Ratchet's ship and blasted off into deep space….

Shadow just smirked, "So Gantz…wanna have some fun or what?" Gantz grinned. "Just like the good old days, huh?"

The good old days…

Shadow and Gantz are seen in motorcycles, shooting everything and anything in their path. Then they're seen being chased by the police in a car. Shadow got out his trusty shotgun and blasted the cars away. Then they're seen flying high above Lunatea on jetpacks. Shadow looked down, "They look like ants…" Gantz turned to him, "They are ants, Shadow. They_ are_!"

Sonic just grinned, "C'mon Klonoa, I've been saving the car for this occasion." Tails merely shrugged and chugged down some orange juice. "Hey Tails…" Knuckles said worriedly. "I think I have a good idea at what Sonic's going to do now…" Tails merely nodded and took another sip. Meanwhile, Sonic and Klonoa got out the car. It looked just like same car from Dukes of Hazzard. "Alright, Klonoa." Sonic said with a grin. "For today, we're gonna have some fun…Dukes of Hazzard style!" Klonoa merely scratched his head. Sonic sighed, "Well first of all, you gotta jump into the car like so." Sonic took two steps back, ran, and jumped through the open window of the car. "Now you try it!" Klonoa sighed, "Well, here goes nothing…" Klonoa took two steps back, ran, and slammed face first into the closed window of the other side of the car. "Oh, sorry," Sonic said simply, "I forgot to pull down the window…" Sonic looked down at Klonoa, lying unconscious… "Hello?" Sonic said, waving his hand in Klonoa's face. "Hey, you in there fella…wake up sleepy head….yoo-hoo…"

Tails and Jet were looking at the damaged TV. "Well, let's get this thing fixed…" Tails groaned. "Can you believe what Sonic did?"

What did Sonic do?

We see Knuckles, Tails and Jet watching a TV special, when all of a sudden, Sonic crashed through the wall on a motorcycle. "Yeah baby!" Sonic said. "This motorcycle is a hard shelled vehicle!" "Sonic, what the _hell_ do you think you're doing?!?" Knuckles asked in frustration. Sonic glanced around nervously, "Oh, well…I'm his evil twin brother from another dimension, ahhhh…" No one was buying it. "Hey look, it's Bubsy!" Knuckles and Tails turned around screaming, while Jet hid under the couch. When they turned around, Sonic was gone.

Naruto and Sasuke walked into the room, "What're you two doing?" Naruto asked lazily. "We're fixing the TV." Jet replied. "Did you two wanna help?" They nodded and began work on the TV. Thanks to Tails' engineering skills, the box was fixed in less than two hours. "Hey, I'm getting something!" Jet cried hopping up and down. "Huh, must be the nature channel." Jet was watching a ferret chewing on what looked like a loaf of bread. "Um…Jet I don't think that's…" Naruto said nervously, but too late. The ferret leaped from the TV in an instant and latched on to Jet's face, scratching and biting at his face. Jet was crying out, "Get it off, _GET IT OFF!!!_" A few minutes later, everyone, except for Sonic and Klonoa were around Jet, who had bandages wrapped around his face. "Great, only a couple of minutes, and Jet is already mauled by a ferret." Sally muttered. "And where's Sonic and Klonoa?" In the silence, the screeching of a car could be heard and a muffled, "_YEE-HAW!!!_" Suddenly, Sonic and Klonoa crashed through the wall, in their Dukes of Hazzard style car.

"Sonic, what're doing!?!" Lolo wailed. "We had some fun and decided to make an entrance." Sonic said in a cool tone of voice. "After all, we didn't want to enter in the boring way…" Ratchet cocked an eyebrow and walked towards the car. "Ya know I can soup up that car to modern standards…" He whispered. Sonic gave a big stupid grin. "With all the works?" Sonic whispered in a Peter Griffin like voice. Ratchet nodded and smiled. Sonic shrugged, "Alright then, it's a deal." Clank stared at Klonoa, who looked a little drunk. "Um, Sonic, where exactly did you go?" Sonic grinned.

_Flashback_

_Sonic and Klonoa are seen at a bar, drunk, with a cup of beer. There must've been at least five beer bottles on the floor. "You…you're sooooo crazy!" Klonoa said in a drunken tone. "Well…well…how many bottles have you drank?" Sonic muttered in his drunken voice. "At least six…I think." Klonoa replied. Sonic shook his head and wobbled over to where Klonoa was sitting. "Sorry buddy, but I'm gonna have to take that seventh glass for ya…" Sonic said before dropping to the ground unconscious…_

As Tails and Cream walked through the village, they noticed a few changes. For one there were paper hearts being hung around the joint, people were acting all lovey dovey…Tails knew what it meant. "So you going to the Valentine's dance tonight?" Tails asked. Cream nodded, "Well everyone is going, so I might as well." Suddenly Sonic ran up to them looking for a hiding spot. "Hide me…" Sonic whimpered. Tails and Cream looked up to see Amy, calling for Sonic. "Oh, Sonic!" Amy called out. "Where are you? Can't you see I want to take you to the dance?" Sonic trembled behind Tails and Cream, and then she spotted him. "There you are!" Amy called out. "You realize what this means?" Sonic yelped, "I think I have a good idea what…"

Sonic's Twisted Mind…

Amy is seen in an Electra suit, with Sonic tied to a metal chain. Sonic barked like a dog, and then Amy tugged on the chain, hard to shut Sonic up.

Sonic ran like a little girl out of the village with Amy on his tail. Klonoa and Lolo were walking by when they noticed Sonic run by and yell, "Hello lovebirds!" "We're not lovebirds!" Klonoa shouted. Sonic stopped and sped back over to them. "Oh, and what do these pictures have to say?" He held up pictures of Klonoa and Lolo, hugging before he left Lunatea, then of them holding hands during a nice summer day. Klonoa and Lolo's faces turned beet red. "You've been _stalking_ us?!?" Klonoa cried out. Sonic waved his finger, "Not stalking but investigating!" He then showed pictures of him, in a Splinter Cell outfit, complete with the goggles and accessories. He laughed a Peter Griffin act and ran off. Klonoa merely smirked, "He's that twisted…"

It was later at night that the dance simply started. Everyone was there. Sonic was dancing with Sally, while Tails danced with Cream. Storm was dancing with a young girl. _Oh, god_, Storm thought sheepishly, _calm down, don't get sweaty like you usually do…oh god…oh, god!!!!_ His face turned red and he collapsed. Kirby danced with one of the locals of Dreamland. Well, I'm pretty sure you get the picture, Happy Valentine's Day everybody.


End file.
